The Him Deep Down Read online

  The forest ran out and a small farmhouse rested on a maintained portion of land. The little beige house sat near a chicken coop. A clothesline was strung up; drying overalls and sundresses waved in the breeze. It reminded Andy a little of the place he and Steven had grown up on near Possum Kingdom. But this place was much cleaner and better kempt than his childhood redneck hovel.

  The front door opened and Steven and Andy melted back into the brush. A large, elderly black woman stepped out and closed a screen door behind her. She had on soil-stained jeans and an over-sized work shirt; a sun hat covered most of her graying hair, and a wicker basket was clutched in her hand. Andy wagered she had a garden somewhere and she was going to collect food.

  She walked to the side of the house. The woman was oblivious to the trespassers, and she moved with a confident and relaxed gait. It was an odd sight to see someone so carefree during these times. Andy couldn't recall the last time he took a step without looking over his shoulder. She whistled cheerily and disappeared behind the chicken coop. Andy noted she did not lock the main door of the house. This was the final indicator they were in a safe place. Andy actually felt his apprehension slip off a bit.

  Tim and Nikki finally caught up and lingered near the brothers. Steven started to move in on the house. Andy stopped him and shook his head. He held up five fingers to indicate they needed to wait five minutes.

  The old woman was clearly no threat, but it was important to Andy not to come off as a menace themselves. He waved for the others to come to him and they crept toward the house. Once to the house, they hugged the side of it. Andy noted the clothesline contained men's clothes as well as women's. He broke a sweat when he realized there could very well be someone else inside the house, watching them through the window the entire time, waiting for them to enter just so a shotgun slug could be buried deep within any of them as penalty for trespassing.

  "She's not alone," Andy whispered. He pointed to the clothing line which held two large pair of soiled men's underwear.

  Steven left his position against the house and made his way around the corner. Andy reached out for him but it was too late. Andy had no choice but to track his brother's rash decision and follow him.

  Before Andy even cleared the corner to catch up to his brother, Steven had made his way to the screen door, holding it half open and alarming everyone within twenty feet that it needed oiling. Nikki and Tim followed Andy with hesitancy. There was no turning back. Andy prepared for a shotgun blast to the face as he walked across the threshold of the door, but instead was met with the strong odor of yeast and cinnamon. It wasn't incense either. This was natural. A quick look around the room revealed they'd entered a kitchen openly connected to a small dining area. The wooden floors were old but clean, and the counter clear of clutter but providing a home for various sized canisters that no doubt held sugar, flour, and possibly homemade cookies. This was the kitchen of a baker; a tidy and organized one.

  When done investigating their surroundings, Andy scolded his little brother. "The hell you thinking?"

  "He's not!" Tim added.

  "Who's ever in here was probably watching us the whole time. I wasn't gonna stand out there in broad daylight like a sittin' duck," Steven replied.

  Andy poked his head through the open threshold into the living room. No one was there either. He looked around the small living room. "We need to check the rooms."

  Steven entered the living room and started to make his way toward a hallway off the other side of the room.

  "No, Steven," Andy said. He motioned to Tim and Nikki. "You two go scope it out. Steven, you stay with me."

  Steven scowled but did as he was told.

  Andy saw a fresh loaf of bread and pitcher of lemonade on the dining room table. Part of him fought to be mindful, but he was starving. The granola bars were the only thing any of them had eaten since the night before. He dug his hand near the heel of the loaf and pulled off its caboose. He devoured it hungrily.

  "Shit man, save some for me," Steven said, grabbing a chunk of the bread himself. He spit the old chaw from his mouth and onto the wooden floor, an act not gone unseen by Andy, who then paid his brother a disagreeing glare. Steven shrugged his shoulders and kicked the wad out of sight and under the line of cupboards.

  Tim and Nikki returned to the living room. "It's clean," Tim said. "Two small bedrooms and a bathroom. That's it."

  Andy nodded and motioned to what was left of the bread. Tim and Nikki needed no prodding. They joined their friends and greedily consumed what was left on the table.

  Steven started to pick up the pitcher to drink from it.

  "Find glasses," Andy barked, spraying crumbs at his brother.

  Steven put down the lemonade and opened cabinets. He managed to find some tall Dixie cups. The group filled them and gulped the lemonade down.

  Andy looked around, realizing this was a decent place to ride things out. "We're taking this," he said aloud. "Hopefully, we'll make the old lady and whoever else lives here see the benefit of bringing us in."

  "Fuck that," Steven said wiping crumbs from his lips. "We just tell them how it is. We ain't got time to be pleasant in this world. We tell them what's up and how things are gonna be, and if they ain't agreeable, we kill them."

  "Shut up, Steven!" Nikki shouted. "There's so few of us left, and you're just so eager to kill off anyone we run across. How are we ever going to get shit back on course that way?"

  "You're just not thinking right, Nikki," Steven said. "It's every person for themselves now. It's all about survival. And if I got to shit on a few people to make sure we survive, then that's what I'm going to do."

  "There ain't no reason we can't make this work without threatening or killing," Andy threw in. "There's safety in numbers. We just got to convince the old lady of that. But yeah, we are staying. This is too sweet to walk away from. It's going to happen, but let's try to make it happen as pleasantly as possible."

  Movement outside through the screen door caught their eye. It was the old black woman, now approaching the three small steps to the door. The gang froze there in the kitchen with bellies full of stolen hospitality. Steven was the first to move, raising the bat behind his head as though waiting for a pitch. The woman, focusing on each careful step she took, never saw the intruders until she'd entered her house.

  Andy's voice broke the stillness. "We're not here to hurt you."

  The woman looked up startled and dropped the basket, the eggs that filled it shattering upon impact with the floor.

  "But we will if need be," Steven said, tightening his grip on the bat. "Who's here with you?"

  The frightened woman quickly gave a response. "No one. It's just me. I live alone."

  "Liar. I seen the clothes on the line," Steven said, moving in closer.

  "Hang on, Steven. Look at her. She's no threat. She's scared to death. Put the bat down, man." Andy directed his comments at his brother before turning to the woman and changing his tone. "Ma'am, we're here to help each other. I'm sorry we scared you. At least we weren't one of them monsters, eh?" Andy nodded toward the yard.

  Tim reinforced Andy's nonthreatening demeanor. "Here, let's all sit down and maybe we could ask you some questions." He pulled out a chair for the woman.

  "Yeah, let's sit down," Nikki said, near trembling and uncomfortable with their intrusion. She grabbed herself a chair and slid carefully into it as though teaching the woman how it's done.

  The old woman walked around the egg mess and to the chair Tim had pulled for her. Once she was in the chair, Andy began a gentle interrogation.

  "Who are you? What's your name?"

  The old woman looked at each trespasser before answering. "Sunsiray. Sunsiray Feagan."

  "Who else is here with you, Sunsiray? We know you're not alone."

  "My son. We live here together."

  "Where is he now?"

  "He's playing in the woods."

  "Playing? Forgive me, Sunsiray, but you're a little old to hav
e a son that's out playing, aren't you?"

  "Jesse is my special boy. He may not be like others, but he can take care of himself."

  "So he's retarded or something?" Steven snorted.

  Andy shot his brother a cold look.

  Sunsiray's eyes trailed to the floor, uninterested in entertaining him with an answer.

  "Well, if he is special, playing in the woods is the last place he should be. And judging by the obstacle course you've got set up outside, I don't think I need to tell you that," Andy said.

  Sunsiray continued to stare at the floor, unfazed.

  "You make this bread? I hope you don't mind we helped ourselves. It's the first real food we've had in some time," Nikki said, as if speaking to the woman at a church social.

  "It's almond bread. And that lemonade you helped yourself to is fresh from the lemons out back. Everything is fresh and organic here—including my dinner lying on the floor." Sunsiray pointed toward the wreckage of eggs.

  "Yeah, the bread was great, lady. But those chickens are where it's at. We need to be frying up a few of those. Get some protein in us, ya know?" Steven blurted out.

  "Those chickens give us eggs. Only a fool like yourself would kill them off for a single meal rather than thinkin' far enough ahead to your next one," Sunsiray declared.

  "Well, look at that. Aunt Jemima here don't like fried chicken."

  The woman recoiled as if slapped.

  "What the hell, Steven!" Tim exclaimed, reaching for the young man.

  Steven immediately hiked the bat over his shoulder and poised himself to strike at Tim.

  Andy put himself between both men. "Knock that shit off," he warned. He looked to Sunsiray.

  "I am sorry, ma'am. That was totally uncalled for and I apologize for my brother's behavior."

  "Your brother?" Sunsiray seemed intrigued and gave a chuckle.

  "Something funny?" Andy asked.

  "You lookin' after something you can't control. But I get it now. He's your brother and you're gonna clean up whatever mess he makes."

  "Lady, I don't need no babysitter. This is a free world, freer than it's ever been and I'm a survivor. This is survival of the fittest now. You get that?" Steven yelled.

  Andy held his hand up to silence Steven. "Listen, ma'am…"

  Nikki sat up, interrupting Andy, and stepped to Sunsiray, getting in her face. "We are not bad people. But we will do what we have to. We don't want to hurt you, but we will, you understand? Please don't make us have to."

  Sunsiray stared at the violent strangers in her house. She settled back, shook her head and groaned. She mopped sweat from her forehead with the back of her hand and took a deep breath.

  "You know what the problem is when the world falls apart?" Sunsiray asked. "We start to act like we are deep down. When there are no rules and laws, what we are inside comes out. Those monsters out there, they got a shelf life. Look at them—they're falling apart already. Soon they'll be nothing but dust and we'll be able to control and manage death so that it don't go crazy like this again. But here we are, killing and threatening and extorting. I'm not saying you are bad people, but you're not good for what this world needs now. I won't help you. And you are not welcome here. If you want my house you'll have to kill me. And you'll have to kill my boy too when he comes back."

  "Not a problem," Steven smirked.

  Andy shoved Steven back. He motioned to all of his comrades. "I want to talk to her alone," Andy said. "Go outside, give us some space."

  "I'll pick out a chicken to fry," Steven threatened, quickly licking his fingertips.

  "You go outside and you don't do a damn thing, any of you, until I say otherwise. Steven, you stop acting this way or I'll be kickin' your ass."

  They left, Steven chuckling and swinging the bat in the air.

  Andy knelt down to Sunsiray. "We can protect you," he said passionately. "You and your boy. You don't have to be alone anymore."

  "We've done fine by ourselves," Sunsiray insisted. "My husband, he saw this coming. He got bit early on, and he and my boy fortified the woods before he died and came back. We put him back down, of course. He's got a nice little grave a few feet into the woods off the back of the house. We've been okay this whole time, mister. I don't need or want you or your friends here."

  "World's not the same anymore, ma'am," Andy said. "Now we see your home here as a safe, decent place to ride this out. We're not leaving. We can share, we can help and we can follow your rules. But we're not leaving."

  "Your brother barely follows your rules," Sunsiray said. "I know what he thinks of me. If you weren't here, he'd lynch me or my boy just to prove a point."

  "No you got it wrong," Andy argued softly. "He's no killer, and he's no racist. He's just really raw from the way things are out there. He's having a hard time coping. My brother is a good man, deep down. That's not him inside."

  "Who you trying to convince?" Sunsiray chuckled. "That boy is rotten to the core. I see it. I'd sooner put a rattlesnake in my bed then have him in this house."

  "This doesn't have to be a hostile takeover, Miss Feagan," Andy said, trying his damnedest to appeal to her. He didn't want to kill this woman or her son. But it was starting to look like the easier route—just another sin to try and forget if the world righted itself.

  "I ain't gonna make it easy on you," Sunsiray said firmly. "Leave my home or kill me."

  "If that's how it's got to be, that's how it's got to be. But I don't want this," Andy said grimly.

  "If you don't want this, then just leave. Take responsibility for your own life, your own safety."

  Andy stared through the woman, contemplating just how far he'd go to keep him and his friends safe. They needed this place, and she would never allow it. While she lived. He considered strangling her. He could put a knife in her hand and tell the others she came at him. They'd suspect, but never openly question him. But what about her kid? If he was simple, maybe they could make him believe his mama had died another way. Andy could protect her boy, and pay for his sin in that manner—if Steven didn't kill the kid first. His eyes blinked and he shook his head as if brushing off such thoughts.

  "That'd be too hard for you, wouldn't it darlin'?" Sunsiray said, sensing Andy's inner turmoil. "It's easier just to take from someone else. That's the problem with everyone—thinking they entitled, thinking they are owed something. But take note young man—God's watching us. Even closer now."

  "There is no God," Andy said hatefully.

  "Oh, He is there. And there are still good people worshipping him," Sunsiray said, an unyielding faith in her voice. "The monsters, zombies, whatever you want to call them—they was a test. This is another biblical flood. The earth is being cleansed. And, honey, it is about time."

  "That's fucking nonsense," Andy argued. His hearty interjection gave way to a sudden lightheadedness.

  He looked to the floor. The boards changed position, overlapping one another, the lines becoming harder to differentiate. His vision created trails that weren't there as he looked back to Sunsiray. There was two of her. Both were smiling.

  "What's the matter, boy? Feeling a little out of sorts?"

  Andy recalled the food and drink they'd taken; the remains stared back at him from the table like reminders of what he'd become, what the entire world had become—man killing man, man killing woman—unforgiveable sins. There would never be any forgetting any of it whether the world fixed the plague or not.

  "You drugged us," he said, his words slurring at the end.

  "I put that spiked bread and lemonade out every day, darlin'," Sunsiray admitted, her voice deepening and her words crawling. "You gotta know the best way to trap a critter."

  Andy stumbled toward the front door. His vision pulsed and the house splashed around him in waves. Pushing through the doorway was like running underwater. He paused at the threshold of the front door and saw his people lying on the ground. Every one of them had eaten and everyone had succumbed to the woman's tainted bait.
/>   Andy made it through the door and down the steps. In an attempt to bend down and check on his brother, Andy fell hard to the ground, his vision tunneling away. As he lay there, before darkness dulled his eyes, a pair of large, muddy boots parked in front of his face.

  He closed his eyes, never expecting to open them again.

  ***

  Andy and Steven were at their Uncle's farm near Apple Springs. He was sixteen, Steven twelve. They were fishing for crawdads with raw bacon and twine. Afterwards, Steven had shot a stray dog with his .22 while they hiked through the woods. Andy had scolded his brother and then killed the helpless dog to end its suffering.